How well do you know those who are important in your life? And I mean really know them?

I recently read She Reads Truth: Holding Tight to Permanent in a World That’s Passing Away by Raechel Myers and Amanda Bible Williams. Not far into the book Amanda was sharing about her father, who had since passed away, and the details she used to describe him made me ask myself how well I know those who are important in my life.

When I ask this, I don’t mean the obvious things a co worker could tell me about them, but the little things that only those who are important to them would know. Now, before this starts to sound stalker creepy I’m not referring to that either. In the book Amanda shares her memory of his voice, him on the tractor mowing the greens at the various golf courses he ran, the baggy overalls she wore that he hated, how he combed his hair, and his smile on her wedding day.

Amanda goes on to ask “how can thirty years be reduced to a glass not even half full?” This made me stop as I was reading and ask myself how many specific details I could name about those who matter to me.

I sat there, book in hand, and let my mind wander to those who matter to me and what I love about them. The smile I love seeing on my dad as he plays with my dog. The joy my dog has running around like a wild nut in her play yard. The conversations my mom and I have in the car going shopping.

The more I thought about it, the more memories I wanted. Then I got this crazy idea, what if I took 30 days and made a list of one detail each day about someone who matters to me?

I know this may be harder if the individual isn’t around anymore, but you can still do this!

Here are 5 ideas to help you get started:

  1. Be present when you are around the people who matter to you. If you have the opportunity to be with someone who is important to you, be present when you are there.
  2. Ask yourself, what makes me happy with this person? What makes this person happy and how do they show it?
  3. Look at photos of the person. What stands out to you? Is it their smile? Is there a pattern to the colors they wear?
  4. Ask someone who knew/knows them for memories they have with them. You may be surprised by what you learn about someone through someone else.
  5. Keep a list of the details.

I made a printable to keep my list on because I plan on keeping it and then passing it down to my kids since many of the people who matter to me will matter to them one day too.

To get your free printable list, just tell me where to send it.